Bloody Billy.

Bloody Billy ?

Well, to start with, even though it has little if anything to do with the true tale - is this, and you may remember it ?

'the night was dark and stormy

the billy goat was blind

he backed into a barbed wire fence

and hurt his

never mind'.

Blimey, shades of many moons ago.

**

Now, the true tale begins.

But as with ALL true stories it does not start with –

'Once upon a time'.

On a particular sunny day, My Big Sis - Your Mum, decided more milk was required as Myrtle, the black and white milker was not giving much, a trip to the local Charlestown shop was needed.

So, your Sis - Sonia and your Unca Jim were duly despatched to obtain some.

A quart billy can was produced, also the necessary money and we set off along the eastern side of the Highway so as not to cross until the shopping area.

  Good decision.

Upon obtaining the 'said' quart of milk and with the billy can lid firmly set in place, we began the return journey. We also agreed for reasons now unknown, to go back on the western side of the highway.

   Bad Decision.

Now, the day was bright and sunny, not anything like the other billy goats night, so we strolled along carrying the billy can by its bowed wire handle.

Some times she, some times me.

Some times between us.

Being a young innocent boy from the city, wide eyed about bushy things, I was not aware or prepared for that which soon occurred.

Along this western side was a fenced paddock which constrained a white billy goat. This paddock was still a distance from our destination and on the opposite side of the highway.

Nevertheless, 'Billy' appeared friendly as we approached. This being so, we decide he deserved a pat on his head. We took turns at patting. 'Billy' seemed pleased. He also took an interest in that which we were carrying. Perhaps the smell was interesting or the shininess was appealing.

We decided to allow 'Billy' a closer look by raising it up and over the fence.

A few things I learned that day -

Goats can be friendly.

Goats have hard heads.

Goats like to butt at things.

Goats know how to spill milk, almost a full quart.

and - - - -

- - - - - - - -

older sisters can get very cranky.

OH YES !   and one thing more -

what a sore bum feels like.

***

POOR   Rimeriter.

Writers - Press Release & Book Launch.


Ever wondered how a budding self publisher can get made a book known to the world?

The bad news is that no one can give you a sure fire formula that can guarantee you achieve this.

The good news is that Press Releases can offer the first time author an affordable, proven way at potentially getting a massive amount of media attention!  



So What’s a Press Release?

For the author, a press release is a great way to share news about your new book. The key here is that it needs to be newsworthy, i.e.  it’s interesting or important enough that news publishers would want to report it.

A press release is a statement prepared for distribution to the news media announcing something claimed as having news value with the intent of generating media coverage. In other words, the aim is to get your news item published so you get lots of free advertising!



The First Important Element

The press release is generally around 500 words in length and the most critical part of it is probably the headline. You have one chance to impress so make sure your headline stands out from the many hundreds of other news releases that journalists skim through daily.



The Second Important Element

Find the right angle; make sure your press releases are written in a newsworthy manner- is your news release relevant to some other current major news items? Remember this is not a advertisement, and if you overhype your press release you will be ignored.



The Third Important Element

Make sure you include a good call to action; whether it’s to contact you for more information or to buy your book. Ensure all the relevant contact details are in place, if those details are not there, your news released will be trashed.



The Final Element

Your press release needs to be distributed to press distribution services that journalists actually read, and that provide good coverage. If you go for the free press releases you are going to get what you pay for: nothing!

We utilise a proven press release service in Australia, which has a reach of several thousand journalists Australia wide in TV, radio and print.

In the US, we use PR Newswire which is the same distribution service that many professional publicity companies and Fortune 500 companies use. With PR Newswire, your news release will reach over 250,000 US news subscribers, and over 30,000 journalists and bloggers, including outlets such as USA Today, NY Times, and Washington Post.

In summary, press releases are a great way for the self publisher with a tight budget to potentially gain massive attention for their book without selling the farm. It would be a real loss to any author who misses out on utilising this tool.



Hope you enjoyed this article!


Regards,

Terence Tam

Bookpal.

***

Charlotte takes novel approach to book launch

URL: http://www.wordsoutwest.com.au/client/index.cfm/2012/6/21/Charlotte-takes-novel-approach-to-book-launch

Students from St Mary's Primary School performed a scene from Charlotte Calder's new book for young readers titled The Ghost at the Point. It was the perfect way to introduce everyone to the book which features a cast of "goodies and baddies" in a thrilling historical mystery to make your spine tingle.

It was the first time the Library had hosted a performance for a book launch and it tied in well with the National Year of Reading celebrations which promote reading as fun.

Author Charlotte Calder was thrilled with their efforts and was impressed to see her story come to life before a large crowd of family, friends and well wishers.

The book launch was supported by Boomers Bookshop and ABC Centre. This is Charlotte's sixth book to be launched at the Orange City Library and supported by the Central West Writers' Centre. Well done everyone!

***

Poetry Review and Discussion.

Maybe because I get a mention, this item is very interesting. 

However, it is a distillation of many, many insights and comments.       

Group: Poetry Review and Discuss

      Discussion: What makes a composition a free form poem rather than simply a piece of chopped-about prose? This is something that taxes me and I would love feedback.

       

Bonnie Jean, if I may be so bold (and too often am), you have no cause whatever for embarrassment.

Look above at Bonnie Roberts and James Hercules and James Brown and Jim Spain and Ronald--five of the finest critical minds on these pages--attempting to define poetry.

And failing magnificently. 

While reading their wonderful posts I have come to some penetrating new insights on the nature of poetry and prose. What I have NOT learned is--what IS poetry?

I mean, a normative "definition". a delineation that will encompass all poetry. Uh-uh. Not going to happen. And IMO, probably we'll encounter similar roadblocks defining prose.



And in various posts and at various junctures in their discussion, the five thinkers noted above acknowledge the great difficulty of defining art forms--and question the value of the enterprise--if it inhibits the creativity of artists.



Bonnie Jean's question opens up yet anothe avenue of enquiry:how to distinguish (or should we bother) between "prose" and "story" or "fiction"?

A lot of stories, traditional and contemporary, present in Poetry--but many more in what most of us would call "prose". Where's the dividing line?



Help, Fab Five!

Posted by Clark Cook

Good advertisement.

This article appeared recently as an ABC RURAL webpage.

A poem for the grey nomads

By Caddie Brain

Tuesday, 5 June  2012 

If you drive along the Stuart Highway at the moment, it's just one long line of white caravans headed in both directions.

With the cooler months upon us, the grey nomads are out in force.

There's queues at the petrol bowsers, and the caravan parks are full.

It inspired our resident bush poet here at the Northern Territory Country Hour Jim Spain, to pen a few words -

Ramblin' the road that leads to everywhere is mighty good for your soul.

Do not select a particular place, have anywhere as your goal –

Road to Everywhere.

There s a road that leads to everywhere across rolling hills and plains,

by red dirt it is painted, 

even down flat culvert drains.

It stretches to high mountains where wide winged eagles soar, 

it plunges down to valleys and where mighty rivers roar 

then meanders to far oceans with a whitened crystal shore.

Rolling hills dressed in their greenery are solace to your eye, 

as a portrait with a backdrop, a softly tinted sky.

Saltbush plains are finely dotted with pincushion mimosa clumps, 

while corrugated, winding mountain tracks or gravelled trails with stumps, 

cause an exhilaration in a pounding heart which thumps.

Torrential rains rush to the South to make all rivers run - 

with sparkling, glistening water which dances in the sun.

So take the Road to Everywhere, to connect with every other one.

©. Rimeriter circa 2000.

Maggie comes to Town.

Whilst the weather in the west of Aus. was dry and dusty, we have had some country dwellers come to town.
The following post should 'paint the picture' -

Maggie comes to Town.

He had flown across the mountain, because the water’s runnin’ low, parched lands were increasing day by day.

He travelled to the city where the rivers were in flow, found them pleasant and decided he might stay.

It was the Georges, where he landed to have a look around,

found a lake with tall timber at its edge.

High branches with green foliage, somewhat similar to home,

this place might be nice to have a rest.

Soaring high on pleasant updrafts, watching all within his view,

he could see feathered others in their nest.

No sign of predators or fire, left behind the Western Ranges, where drought is causing animals to die.

Soft morning sun from dawn to dusk, green and grassy is the land,

cotton clouds framed by a pale and blue hued sky.

He found a backyard garden, just at the river edge, with a birdbath and low foliage on the scene.

Tasty tank water, right for drinking and for bathing, then a space to spread his wings to stretch and preen.

But little sign of  roadkill, or other food of choice, that was until a human came out through her door.

She spread red meat upon the grass, some soft, some very stringy, more like dead ‘roo or Wallaby’s hardened paw,

which needed both his strong beak, to rip and tear to shreds, as he once did when in his western range.

He then began to sense, this is not so bad at all, even though it began as, very, very strange.

When once he had ‘settled in’, with competition thin, he began his strange but friendly magpie ‘talk’.

So then each and every day, when his human would appear,

he’d fly to her feet to say good morning with a

gutteral magpie  -  “ grawk  ‘.

©. Rimeriter 28/4/12.

Leap Year Birthday.

Munger Time.

Long time no write.

Maybe because, 

there’s nothing much about which to skite.

But I’ll persevere and pen a few, about a recent luncheon do.

Phil’s  birthday. 

He’s just turned ten, takes his place with older men. 

Born in a leap he skips a few so we just had to have a do.

P’raps never been naughty and he'd really reached forty, 

so we made our way to Chowder Bay.

Ripples Restaurant is situate there, 

so we booked a table and of course a chair.

They gave us some grub on funny plates – 

( not the place for some bushie mates )

 – but the tucker was good ‘n so were we.

Mother, Chrissy and I made three.

Phil came too – well naturally.

© Rimeriter.11/3/12.

Bush Hat.

A broad-brimmed hat
is as much a part of working
in the Australian Outback
as sturdy boots.
 (Neroli Roocke)

The image is made available by Neroll, ABC Rural.
                                           ***


Bloody ol' Hat.


This bloody ol’ hat is not just tat, it keeps sun off our head,
the very wide brim protects our neck ‘n keeps it from our eyes.
Wear it always in the bush ‘n under wide blue skies.

(c).Rimeriter. 3/12.

NOTE - This is a work in progress.
I really need some help.

Will you HELP me ??

Blondes are the Best.

I have posted these to make us laugh, because I am told that laughter is good medicine -

Blondes are Best.

A blonde & her housemate are lying in bed 

listening to the next door neighbor's dog.. 

It has been in the backyard barking for hours and hours.

The blonde jumps up out of bed and says, 

"I've had enough of this". 

She goes downstairs.

The blonde finally comes back up to bed and her housmate says, 

"The dog is still barking, what have you been doing?"

The blonde says, 

"I put the dog in our backyard, 

let's see how THEY like it!

**

Two Blondes With Hammers... 

Lynn & Judy were doing some carpenter work on a Habitat for Humanity House. 

Lynn who was nailing down house siding,would reach into her nail pouch, pull out a nail & either toss it over her shoulder or nail it in.

Judy, figuring this was worth looking into, asked,

Why are you throwing those nails away?'

Lynn explained, 'When I pull a nail out of my pouch, about half of them have the head on the wrong end and I throw them away.'

Judy got completely upset and yelled, 

'You moron! Those nails aren't defective! 

They're for the other side of the house!'

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

A blonde was driving home after a game & got caught in a really bad hailstorm.. 

Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it To a repair shop. 

The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided to have some fun... 

He told her to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, & all the dents would pop out.

So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands & knees & started blowing into her tailpipe..  Nothing happened.. So she blew a little harder, & still nothing happened.

Her blonde roommate saw her & asked, 'What are you doing?' 

The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the tail pipe 

in order to get all the dents to pop out.

The roommate rolled her eyes and said,

 'Uh, like hello! 

You need to roll up the windows first.'

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

A blonde was shopping at Target & came across a shiny silver thermos. 

She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up & took it to the clerk to ask what it was. 

The clerk said, 'Why, that's a thermos.....

It keeps hot things hot,  And cold things cold.'

'Wow, said the blonde, 'that's amazing.....I'm going to buy it!' 

So she bought the thermos & took it to work the next day. Her boss saw it on her desk. 'What's that,' he asked?

'Why, that's a thermos..... It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold,' she replied..

Her boss inquired, 'What do you have in it?'

The blond replied......

'Two popsicles & some coffee.

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss asked sympathetically, 'What's the matter?'

The blonde replies, 'Early this morning I got a phone call saying that my mother had passed away.' 

The boss, feeling sorry for her, says, 'Why don't you go home for the day? Take the day off to relax & rest.'

'Thanks, but I'd be better off here. 

I need to keep my mind off it and I have the best chance of doing that here.' 

The boss agrees & allows the blonde to work as usual.

A couple of hours pass and the boss decides to check on the blonde. 

He looks out from his office and sees the blonde crying hysterically... 'What's so bad now? Are you gonna be okay?' he asks.

'No!' exclaims the blonde. 

'I just received a horrible call from my sister. 

Her mother died, too!'

Blondes Are The Best !!!

The ROCK.

Travelin’ tandem to Uluru.

Is there nothing else you’d rather do ?

Travel with care. Take it real slow.

Ridin’ through bulldust is part of the go.

Seein’ our Aus. with rusty red dust.

Spinifex. Termites, is surely a must.

Adelaide, Port Augusta then Coober Pedy.

Well on your way, don’t be too speedy.

Turn off to the right to visit Lake Eyre,

many the sights you will see while your there.

Back on the Stuart, cross over the line,

a mark on your map, your doin’ fine.

Very soon after,

take the left turn,

headin’ now for the

‘ Rock.

An image will burn.

Sure, it is hot.

But scenery is the very best

part of the plot.

Locked in your memory for now and all time

are Aboriginal stories from their distant

Dreamtime.

Remember them well

Nicola Syme.

©.Rimeriter. 2/2012.

1 of 2.

Riding tandem to Uluru. (Caddie Brain)

ABC Alice Springs.

As the phrase says when life gets tough, the tough gets going.

And that's certainly true for Nicola Syme.

It all got a bit much for the young New Zealander who decided to hire a motorbike with a friend, and ride from Melbourne to Uluru.

"It was a rather large life upheaval really.

"I split up with a boyfriend, I quit my job, I moved interstate.

"And my friend Joel was like 'right, I need a holiday. Come on let's go and do a mission through the centre of Australia.'

"So there's lots of stuff going through my head; there's a lot of thinking going on.

"It's actually quite therpeudic."

The two travellers are riding tandem over thousands of kilometres, through the heat, with just a few small packs of luggage.

"The heat the last few days has definitely been the hardest thing to deal with.

"The sweat just drips down your legs.

"But I would not do it any other way, it's awesome."

***

Job Offers in the Internet Age.

Red Flags on Job Offers

by Lorraine Mace

In this internet age it has never been easier for writers to find work. Opportunities seem to be (and are) abundantly advertised on various sites, including bidding and pay per click revenue outlets. However, the downside of this is that it has also never been easier for writers to be taken for a ride and end up out of pocket in terms of time and effort. There are all too many supposed job offers that are, in truth, little more than slave labour and others that are scams. For the unwary writer looking to make a living from their craft, all too often unscrupulous people are waiting to take advantage of the writer’s readiness to take their job offer at face value.

So, how can you tell when an online writing job offer is better left unanswered than followed up? Fortunately, there are some obvious red flags to look out for.

Deadline for delivery, when paid (publication or on acceptance), the rights being purchased (all rights, electronic, or print), when payment will be made and how.

Remember that your non-fiction writing should be treated as a business. Writing fiction for the love of it, because the characters are burning holes in your brain is one thing, but researching, planning and writing an article should always have a payment at the end of it. If you value your worth as a writer, it is going to be harder for an unscrupulous person to take advantage of you.

Lorraine Mace is a columnist with Writing Magazine (UK) and also deputy editor of Words with JAM. She writes fiction for the women’s magazine market, features and photo-features for monthly glossy magazines and is a writing competition judge for Writers’ Forum.

Find out more about Lorraine by visiting her website: www.lorrainemace.com

BE CAREFUL.

DO NOT GET CAUGHT.

Jim.

Ayres Rock/Uluru.

Ayres Rock.

1952.                                                              

Nestling in a desert wasteland

is this monolith of fame,

perhaps a creature quietly sleeping,

omniscient, oh! so tame.

Knowing all but seeing nothing

as many others pass it by

while it dwells in concentration

underneath a pale blue sky.

Raw,coarse textures paint its surface,

colours vary, changing light.

Intense moods in many hues

deepen with approaching night.

Dark and brooding under starlight,

then with the coming dawn,

shifting shadows swiftly scamper

as new morning sun is born.

Rusty red and ochre orange

burst upon a new day’s page.

Pied Butcherbird trumpets, triumphantly

to announce another stage.

Silent,

ancient and archaic

where those rocky ranges rise

to a vista of extremes

underneath

hot azure skies.

©. Rimeriter. 2005.